Pray for me, Father: I sinned and brought shame down on us. I burned myself on the stove. I went to a few parties and had a good time. I stole a small fishing boat and sailed it to the Delta. I’ve lost my appetite. I’ve lost the car keys. I didn’t get around to putting all the photos in frames. I’ve known a lot of women in my time. I don’t know a great deal about politics. I didn’t get into Nirvana until after MTV Unplugged came out—I’m always late to the party. I’m going to be late for work. Please forgive me these things and the people I have wronged. If anyone finds out, you’re dead meat.